It's time for a change...and other ramblings

My apologies for not posting for some time. I was down and out with the flu for most of the week, but am back on my feet.

Israel has been treating me extremely well. I have been learning not only a lot about Torah and Judaism, but a lot about myself. What kind of environments I work best in, what drives me in life, and most importantly, I need to smile more! :)

The past ~2 weeks I have been attending Yeshiva Aish Hatorah. It is a wonderful place, but have found that it does not serve my learning style nor the type of environment I want to be in. Aish does a fantastic job with recent college graduates who are looking at a long term stay (1+ years), but the age difference causes a large maturity gap which I recognized this week. Simply put, I will not be staying there for the rest of my time. I have had the opportunity to attend a small yeshiva named Bircas Hatorah (http://www.bircas.org) for the past few days and think it might be a good fit. The men studying there are fantastic and have already made some great contacts. There passion and love for Torah is amazing and hope this can rub off on me. At Bircas I might be one of the younger/less advanced students, however this will put me in a great place to be surrounded by true talmid torah's.

On to another subject...Yesterday I went for a walk as I have Fridays off. While I was walking I noticed a street blocked off with police cars. As I approached I noticed the "bomb" robot was out dismantling a suspicious package. I took one look, headed to another street to walk around the incident, with some other Israelis, and didn't think twice about what I had just walked into...About 10 minutes later I could not believe how this did not even phase me. If this happened in Boston, everyone and their mother would be running. So what gives? The culture here in Israel is just so desensitized to these events that life just moves on....A bomb threat, no big deal, soldiers walking around with loaded m-16 rifles, no big deal, fighter jets flying over head, no big deal.

I think everyone in the US has allot to learn from the Israeli culture. Every coffee shop I go into I get searched and I do not care because I am safe. Every person I have seen could care less as well about the so called "invasion of privacy" as we put it in the US. In the US we cry over proposals for police on the MBTA searching our belongings. GET OVER IT. Everyone is extremely happy in Israel (including the cafe I am sitting in now where everyone just got strip searched by a security guard) and people are safe. The past ~3 weeks has put a lot in perspective for me about terrorism, invasion of privacy, and simply how much of a bunch of cry babies we are in the United States. I love the US of A, but we all need to take a step out of our silver spoon cocoons and put life and more importantly, our countries security in perspective. Listen, I am not advocating security guards at our stores at home but on transit systems, yes. With all the "restrictions" and invasion of privacy on Israeli citizens, they are as free as we are at home and just as happy or even happier. Ask an Israeli if they would move out of their country, a big NO. The political climate changes in the US and everyone is ready to move to Canada. Again, lets get some perspective folks...We have life SO good in the United States and all we do is cry all day....About gas prices, taxes, etc....Cherish our freedom, cherish our low prices, and simply stop crying.

Understanding how much you simply do not know

It's was a humbling day for me today...Sitting in the Beis Midrash learning some Gemara (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gemara) and I had a brief heart attack. For a split second I understood how much I simply do not know. So it got me thinking not just about Judaism but peoples lives, our world, world politics, etc and how much people think they know but simply have no clue about. Maybe it's ego, maybe it's a lack of understanding to the depth of knowledge needed to be acquired (as such in my case), or maybe it's a lack of simple ignorance.

While I know I will leave my 3 months in Jerusalem with a solid education and love for Torah, I think the greatest gift I might leave with is respecting how much knowledge needs to be acquired on any subject or topic to have an ability to have any perspective.

It's something, for myself, I have seen far too often (and am guilty of as well). Personally I feel this comes from our instant gratification westernized culture. Everyone has an opinion and no one has any clue what they are talking about. I only hope that I can take this gem of an insight throughout my life and become not just a Torah Jew, but someone who has knowledge and true appreciation for the complexities in this world.

At last....In Jerusalem

This post will have to be short as Shabbat is on its way in! I am here sitting in the Jewish Quarter in Jerusalem. It has been five days since I have arrived and it has been fantastic so far. The adjustment has been hard, from living in a dorm, to grueling 12 hour days studying, but I could not be happier with my choice to come.

I have meet so many people from all over the world who are here just to understand Torah and how it makes us better people and helps explain our world around us. From 20 year old guys who struggling with basic life questions to married men, all have a sense of pure love for Judaism and the thanks on how it has impacted their lives.

During the day, I am often in the Beis Midrash (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beth_midrash) reading. The other day, I picked my head up out of my chumash (Torah translated) and experienced hundreds of men arguing and yelling at each other just as our great Rabbi's did thousands of years ago. The intensity to find truth was a true Kiddush Hashem (sanctification of G-d's name). Where else can you find such an experience? In a law firm, Wall St, the Senate? No where in my opinion. It is an intensity that only truth can bring out....

So what is this all about...

Even for those that know me very well, this trip came as a surprise so I think I owe it to all of you to give you a brief glimpse into my mind....

(edited 1/11/08)

It all started January of 2000 when I went on the first Birthright Israel trip. Somehow I made the choice to miss Phish's millenium NYE celebration to head to Israel for free. All my friends were going, and it was PHISH! This choice, eight years ago from this exact week, I was in Jerusalem seeing the Kotel (Western Wall) for the first time. In an instance my life was changed...For the first time in my life I felt alive and felt a sense of truth in our world that I have never come across.

Every since that moment, I have been on a long and very winding journey. One that has helped me understand who I am and what drives me as a human. The past 1.5 years, I have taken a serious interest in understanding Judaism, from Orthodox Rabbi's in the Boston area. Alot of people have asked me along the way, why Orthodox?! Why not, conservative (for those who are not familiar, Judaism in the US is mainly split into 3 groups Reform, Conservative, and Orthodox. See WIKI link for definitions, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reform_judaism, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conservative_Judaism, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orthodox_Judaism). My whole life, whether it was studying Economics, buying new stereo equipment, or coffee beans (yes I am a coffee snob!), I have always focused on understanding the original source. For instance, while studying Economics, I could not stand when professors gave us books interpreting original texts like Das Kapital. Just give me the original text and let me make my choices/thoughts/beliefs!

For me it was natural to go towards Orthodox. Learn from people who choose to interpret the all original texts. My thought was if I don't agree then I will find my place somewhere else. All I can say is after almost 1.5 years, I have continually seen only fact and truth. Truth in that Torah came from G-d, and there is a way I am (as a Jewish man) suppose to live my life.

To end this post, I am not here to persuade anyone and I simply cannot and will not. In some way it's is like proving to someone why you love your soul mate. How do you even begin? Words can never prove this to someone else...My only hope is that everyone reading this takes time in their lives to explore what our lives are all about and how we are suppose to see reality. I hope my blog serves as a reflection point for you as I continue to explore my reality in this beautiful world!